Red-alert!
Headlines you WON'T see in the Calvary Caller
- Girls create the perfect cheer - Tom Parker agrees.
- High methane levels blamed as building evacuated following chili-eating contest.
- Airforce denies rumors of X-Wing sighted over Clearwater's skies.
- "Tuba-terrorist" goes on early-morning rampage - perpetrator still on the loose.
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